Four Sad Songs
As I mentioned in a previous post, this has been a particularly difficult month so far. I have a lot of ideas for what I want to write about, but very little drive to get it together. In lieu of real content, here’s four sad songs I’m listening to as I grieve for my brother.
Seu Jorge, Life on Mars?
My brother and I both loved The Life Aquatic. Seu Jorge’s pared-down portuguese covers of David Bowie songs feature throughout the film. I think we both liked how goofy the whole thing was (Ann Marie, do all the interns get glocks?), but I also like to think my brother identified with Steve Zissou’s tough-on-the-outside-but-not-so-secretly-sensitive persona. Maybe he didn’t. If not, I’ll do it for him. The covers, the film, the shared memory of watching it in a hotel room together for the first time, all of it is just so fucking bittersweet. Even without the personal dimensions, it’s an incredible album. Go listen to it.
Kevin Morby, Parade
Ugh, this song. So good. Yes, I first heard it over the credits of a Bojack Horseman episode. I’m not even sorry about it. As a side note, I would have loved to watch Bojack with my brother. My brother may have been a Steve Zissou, but I think I’m a little Bojack. Or maybe I’ve just got a soft spot for people who are really trying to keep their shit together while fighting depression, anxiety, and a mile-wide streak of cruel-self doubt. (Side note: the character I most strongly identify with is Mark Maron in his show Maron, but that’s neither here nor there. Or maybe if Maron and Leslie Knope from Parks and Rec had a child. Shit, now I’m way off course).
The Gabe Dixon Band, All Will Be Well
Speaking of Parks and Rec, here’s this song. It’s at least a bit uplifting? I feel like it’s very laden with emotion, and it could go either way. At any rate it’s making me sad now.
Modest Mouse, Missed the Boat
“Float On” played at my brother’s funeral, and I still have trouble hearing it without feeling like someone heavy is sitting on my chest. I listened to a lot of Modest Mouse right after we lost him. This one feels manageable but still carries the same load.
I think that’s the best I can do for now. Sorry folks. // 7×35